​As believers we can find ourselves involved in situations or conversations that may be delicate or difficult. We may want to help but are hesitant because we do not want to make matters worse. These may be divine appointments, where you are the right person to bear witness to a receptive person at just the right moment.Many of these conversations center on medical issues or personal relationships. In a message about mental illness and mental health issues, I once outlined these six guides for holding compassionate conversations that I always seek to practice.

Meet people where they are, not where you think they should be. Compassion starts with respect and dignity.

Listen to their story. Be slow to talk or give advice. Let them unburden in the moment. Listening is the time to keep quiet and understand what they may be communicating. 

Remember, you are not their doctor. Even though medical, psychological or other symptoms may be expressed, or your opinion sought, you are not their doctor.

Set reasonable time and place limits. With deep issues, some people can be overwhelming in their need for conversation. Compassionate conversations are best when held in appropriate places, for agreed upon lengths of time. For example, if you have only 15 minutes for a conversation, agree upon that time frame at the start, or set a better length of time for later. 

Offer an in-the-moment prayer. Ask them how best to pray. Do not always assume that you know what prayer you should offer on their behalf. Ask them, and then pray for that request right then.

Leave them with a word of hope and grace. Conclude your conversation with encouraging words of hope and grace.Point them to Jesus.

Galatians 6:2 reminds us to Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.Compassionate conversations are not always easy, but they can ease the load, shine a light in the darkness and provide a friend for the journey.

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Prepare for your divine appointments. And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

​

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My New Year’s tradition has become finding a word of the year that expresses my hope and shapes my thinking for the months ahead. This year I have settled on the phrase, Choose Joy. I believe that I may be running a low-grade depression, like most everyone I encounter these days, because of the dreariness of a constant stream of bad news everywhere. I need a refocus for 2025. It is always appropriate to grieve, cry, and face sadness, just like any of the other emotions we experience every day. I just want to remind myself to choose joy as often as possible.

Joy is a choice of rebellion against the doom-scrollers. Joy is radical when the crowds around you wallow in the muck of tedious complaints. Joy is not necessarily optimism, but optimists look for the joy. Winston Churchill is often quoted as saying, “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity. An optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”  I clipped an article once on The Seven Qualities of an Optimist:  1) They express gratitude. 2) They donate their time and energy. 3) They are interested in others. 4) They surround themselves with up-beat people. 5) They do not listen to naysayers. 6) They forgive others. 7) They smile. 

Optimist is not a Biblical word, but joy is. To me the seven qualities listed here reflect a Biblical lifestyle of  joy and faith. Those who live by faith, joy, and hope express gratitude to God and others every single day. They donate their time, energy and money in service and ministry. They are genuinely interested in their neighbors. They surround themselves with likeminded believers and mentors. They pray about the critics and the discouragers. They forgive and forgive. And they take joy in walking everyday with their Lord. This is more than positive thinking; it is confident living. It is more than seeing the opportunity; it is embracing the very call of God. May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 15:13)

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Choose joy. And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

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Our neighbors across the street from us have added a spotlighted outdoor nativity scene that is classier than ours. Much classier. We still have not gotten ours unboxed. It has been a busy month.  Many of the houses around us are decorated with all kinds of lights and displays, with an occasional star mounted up high. Santa and the reindeer are everywhere. So are snowmen and multicolored trees. But the display on the lawn or in the window does not mean much unless the Christ of Christmas is in our heart. Each year I look to some of my favorite carols to point the way to our newborn King.

O little town of Bethlehem, how still we see thee lie! Above thy deep and dreamless sleep the silent stars go by. Yet in thy dark streets shineth the everlasting Light; the hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight. The unsuspecting town, filled with grumbling taxpayers and weary travelers, becomes the focal point of God’s divine plan of redemption. The King is coming.

Come Thou long-expected Jesus, Born to set Thy people free. From our fears and sins release us; let us find our rest in Thee. The King is born with a kingdom mission of forgiveness, salvation and grace. Cast your deepest, darkest burdens before Him, and He will give you rest.

O come, desire of nations, bind all peoples in one heart and mind. Bid envy, strife and quarrels cease; fill the whole world with heaven’s peace. The King, who is the Prince of Peace, longs to heal the broken-hearted, mend broken relationships and fill the world with Good News of great joy. Trust His word. Trust His love.

Truly He taught us to love one another; His law is love and His gospel is peace. Chains shall He break, for a slave is our brother, And in His name all oppression shall cease. The King’s life example, His unmatched wisdom, His cruel death on our behalf, and His resurrection overcoming all sin, guilt and even death itself, cause us to bow before Jesus, The King of Kings, and honor His Great Commandment to love others as He loves us.

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. For He alone is worthy!  And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

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Sometimes a malady comes along for which there needs no better a descriptor.  Brain Rot, as defined by the Oxford English Dictionary, is the supposed deterioration of a person’s mental or intellectual state, especially viewed as the result of overconsumption of material (now particularly online content) considered to be trivial or unchallenging. Also: something characterized as likely to lead to such deterioration. Brain Rot—is what you might know as endlessly scrolling Facebook, SnapChat, TikTok, Instagram, WhatsApp, We Chat, Threads, Truth Social, X, You Tube, and on and on. It is like watching the same television station hour after hour, or the opposite, constantly channel surfing. Brain Rot is the 2024 Word of the Year. According to the OED, the term was first used in 1854 by Henry David Thoreau, in his book Walden, comparing the devaluation of intellectual ideas to a mental form of potato rot. I have run across a sub-set of the malady called PDF Brain Rot, a classification afflicting students and employees required to read vast quantities of digital books, research papers, and AI summaries of such materials.  

There is a remedy for brain rot. I suggest three simple ways to lessen the brain rot that may be infecting us.  1. Make something. Use your creativity—draw, cook, sew, plant, build, write, sing, listen.  2. Help someone. Find a need. Make a visit. Serve a meal. Volunteer.  3.  Develop a new spiritual discipline. Explore a time of simplicity, fasting (not just food), generosity (not just money), confession, humility, silence.

As with all forms of fungus and mildew, actual sunlight is the best disinfectant. Take a walk around the block or sit in front of a sunny window. You will begin to feel a real difference.  Brain rot happens because we are bored, exhausted, or unfulfilled in some areas of our inner being.  Read Psalm 37:30-40 and examine yourself before God. 

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Let in the light. And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

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 by Kevin Avery

When following Jesus, there are no shortcuts. Life doesn’t become easier simply because we love Him and trust Him—Jesus is not a genie in a bottle. Neither does it mean life will always become harder just for believing in Jesus, though persecution certainly happens when we follow Him with all our heart. We oversimplify to assume Jesus will make our life easier or harder. Either perspective needs to be transformed because the truth is: Life is Jesus. Truth is Jesus. The same thinking applies to the journey we are taking. The journey is—at least should be—Jesus. I do not mean this in a philosophical way like when Pilot asked Jesus, “What is truth?” (John 18:38). I mean it in a transformative way. 

In John 14:6, Jesus says, I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. When John wrote this verse, he was using Greek. Often, the Greek term ὁδός (hodos) is translated as way, as when Jesus says, I am the way and the truth and the life. However, it can be translated literally as road, path, or journey, or figuratively as way (or manner) of thinking, feeling, or deciding. Most English translations of John 14:6 use the figurative way. However, I believe all these possible translations have much merit. Everything about a believer’s life, whether literal or figurative, should point to Jesus and be about Him. 

In this manner of thinking, I understand that whether we are blessed with treasure—like being married to an amazing wife—or afflicted with adversity—like dealing with an autoimmune disease—everything is a part of our journey to know our Heavenly Father through Jesus. Each day as Hebrews 12:2 tells us, we are to fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith. Every difficulty or joy we encounter is a chance to know Jesus better. In addition, we are on this journey together, even if some members, like me, are homebound. Thankfully, at Braden Park, homebound members are just a phone call away, and prayer is not limited to a location. As Jesus taught his disciples how to pray, it begins: Our Father who is in heaven … and what a blessing it is to pray for and pray with other disciples of Christ Jesus.

Rev. Kevin Avery is our former missionary to China. Through his on-line ministry with ITEE Global, he encourages and prays with pastors in Asia, Africa and the US. (iteeg.org)

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Of all the books in my bookcases, one has a treasured place in my heart. I have mentioned this before. It is called Bible Biographies, edited by Robert Sears and published in 1848. It belonged to Rev. Abraham V. Leonardson, my grandmother’s grandfather on my mother’s side. He received it as a gift of appreciation in 1880. Abram Leonardson, as he called himself, was a Methodist circuit-riding pastor between the Civil War and World War 1. I have a couple of his Bibles, a small number of scrapbooks and this volume on the lives of the people of the Bible that is illustrated with scores of engravings. He and I have been ministering about 100 years apart. He was licensed to the Gospel ministry in 1867, and I was licensed in 1966.

My great-great grandfather served churches in Michigan, Indiana and Ohio. He would pastor as many as four churches at a time, preaching one Sunday a month at each, taking his wagon, later his buggy, to the next church. He was also a writer and turned many of his thoughts into newspaper articles, which he kept in his scrapbooks. Many of the scrapbooks were lost to time but in the few that I possess, his articles focused on holy living, temperance, and faithful prayer. His Bibles are filled with sermon notes and outlines, and even the occasional illustration. In many of his sermons he cried out against materialism. He suggested a better way was humility. He longed for people to find holiness in relationship with Christ.

To A.V. Leonardson, materialism was another word for greed. For our day materialism has been dressed up and passed off as consumerism that is necessary for a thriving economy. The appeal is to our pride, vanity, and pocketbook. Move out of the way Thanksgiving, you are being replaced—the world of Black Friday, Cyber Monday and consumer greed is heading straight for Christmas. Same old sin, only with better marketing, and more costly than ever.

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Find humility this holiday. And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

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Have you ever seen a barge gliding down the Verdigris and Arkansas River Channel? That barge and its cargo could be headed to any port in the world. Located fifteen miles east of downtown Tulsa, the Port of Catoosa is the most inland seaport in all the United States. The McClellan-Kerr Arkansas Navigation System, all 445 miles of it, allows cargo to travel to the Mississippi River and on to the Port of New Orleans. Cargo can also go north on the Mississippi to St Louis, Minneapolis, Chicago and even on to Pittsburg. A single barge can carry the equivalent load of 60 semi-trailer trucks, or 15 railroad cars. The power to drive the barges is provided by tow boats.

Dorothy and I once attended the christening of a brand-new tow boat at the Port of Catoosa. The boat was named in honor of former Tulsa Mayor James M. Hewgley, Jr. We were invited to this event because Dorothy’s office was next door to Mayor Hewgley’s in the Philtower Building downtown. It was at the christening that I learned there was a difference between a tugboat and a towboat.

To me, tug and tow seemed to be interchangeable terms. As a kid, I always heard about tugboats guiding big ships and tow trucks pulling stuff, never about towboats. To me, pulling a boat in the water with ropes and chains seems very similar to towing a boat behind a truck. But in the practical world of navigation, these boats have different designs and different roles.  A tugboat has a pointed bow, works in harbors and open water, and pulls and pushes large ships to safely in a harbor.  A towboat has a flat bow, works in rivers, and pushes and guides barges from the back. A barge that is pushed is easier to control and guide through winding rivers than if it were pulled or tugged. Both kinds of boats have the same purpose—safe passage. Sometimes some of us need a push; others may need a pull. That is one more reason God provides the Holy Spirit—to help navigate us through the week.

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Find safe passage. And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

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There were a few times that, as a youngster, I remember our family taking road trips, some by car and at least one by train. Road trips are sometimes like pilgrimages to revered sites almost sacred in meaning. They all begin with a destination in mind and may, or may not, end well. Dad and Mom loaded the car with suitcases and three kids in the backseat in the days before seat belts. We set off from Miami to Jacksonville, staying with relatives there. We were late for my cousin’s wedding, but we arrived in time for the reception at the Yacht Club. We were underdressed for the party, and I was disappointed that we were not allowed to drink the orange juice punch.

We headed north to the Smokey Mountains and learned the story of my mother’s family trip to the Smokey’s when, as a little girl, she walked over to pet the baby bear. The bear ripped the front of her dress and she was fortunate to survive without scars. We made it to Washington, D.C. to stay with my Aunt Clyde, whoever she was. She took us to the zoo where we witnessed, in horror, a sleepy grizzly bear leap straight up to catch and eat a hapless pigeon that had landed in the tree above. Along the way back we ran out of relatives and stayed at one of those little cabin-like motor inns. The room had a vibrating bed, if you could come up with the quarters. The three kids in the backseat were somehow always in trouble. Then, before we knew it, we were home. 

God’s call to Abraham set him on a family road trip to a land of promise—he obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. (Hebrews 11:8) Like Abraham’s, our life-long road trip is filled with unexpected twists and surprises, bickering and beauty, tragedy and grace. While some may choose to make their pilgrimage on their own, Christ gives us the church, a community of believers to share the journey. 

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Don’t pet the bears. And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

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I do not know when our church became a neighborhood voting precinct site. I know that the first presidential election in my time as pastor here was in 1976. Presidential elections draw large turnouts. We are preparing for the lines, providing more space for those with disabilities, and generally seeking to make the experience as comfortable as possible. Our neighbors are coming here to exercise the most far-reaching act of democracy the world has ever seen—casting their ballots freely, fairly, and privately. There have been additional statewide rules and procedures passed since last time, safeguarding the ballots from the time they are printed until handed to the voter. Additional protections follow the ballots from the ballot box at our church to the County Election Board. The entire voting process is staffed with trained citizens. Neighbors help neighbors, because voting matters.

From my perspective, this has been the most challenging election we have ever faced. I learned early in ministry not to publicly endorse any political candidate, not because my chosen candidate might lose, but because I have known many candidates to succumb to big money, criminality, and/or sexual corruption. I do not want to be found complicit by implication. I appreciate our people taking the political debates outside the ministries of our church. I have run for public office and have both won and lost. I am glad to talk personally and privately to anyone about my political views. I also have found most people really want to hear me say what they already believe, and not why I may look at things from a theological point of view.  What is most important for us as citizens is that we vote. The greater the number of people casting their vote provides a clearer understanding of where we go next as a nation or local community. It is very easy to become cynical, discouraged, and disengaged from the process. Because so many citizens do not vote, we may one day discover we no longer have constitutional rights or free and fair elections. Your voting matters. 

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Go vote. And let’s experience the love and power of God together.

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I love the season of Fall. I’m still waiting for it to start around here. I believe we may have had the first autumn breeze of the season today. Summer has hung around for much too long. I’m ready for some good sweater weather and our family fall foliage tour through the cemetery. Looks like we may have to wait a while longer to see the full range of colors on the trees. During this time of the year I long to see God’s ever-changing palette. A shaft of sunlight will suddenly illuminate a tree, and it seems to call me to a place of reverence and gratitude. It inspires me with awe and wonder. But it also means more change.

Dealing with change is work. It is time to get the furnace checked and the air filters changed. It’s time to clean out the unused or broken stuff. It is time for people of a certain age to figure out new medical plans. On November 3 we will have to change our clocks back again to where God had it in the first place.  Two days later, the election that decides whether America continues as a democracy or something else.  Then it is time to rake leaves and get ready for the holidays, happy or not.

The old saying, the only things that are certain in life are death and taxes, fails to mention change. Everything in life changes. Sometimes I have to remind myself of my own philosophy of transformational change: Embrace change, because change is embracing you. I am not always pleased about the way changes are embracing me.  To find insight into daily life, reality, and change, I suggest a quiet meditation time from the book of Ecclesiastes. Just a little heads up when reading Ecclesiastes, The Teacher, Solomon, is possibly having a mid-life crisis. He seems both depressed and hopeful at the same time. He is wrestling with questions on the meaning of life and his place in the world. Read chapters 3 and 5, then 11 and 12, for guidance on living a valued life before God and the world. Everything will change, but Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday, today and forever. (See Hebrews 13:1-8)

Keep healthy. Pray mightily. Enjoy your life today. Behold the wonder of change. And let’s experience the love and power of God together. 

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